I got to preach this weekend at St. Paul's and the gospel reading was the story of Doubting Thomas. Confession: I dislike that nickname a lot. Thomas was a brave disciple. He was the only disciple to vow to follow Jesus to his death and the disciple who gave the greatest confession of faith in the gospels: "My Lord and my God."
Another confession: right after I finished writing my sermon, I was playing around online and took a "What New Testament Character" quiz on the United Church of Christ website (ok...third confession...I like taking quizzes)! Guess what New Testament character I was? Yep...Doubting Thomas.
But my connection to him isn't the only reason I think he's gotten a bad rap with the whole "Doubting" nickname. It's pretty clear the nickname has had negative connotations for most people who read it over the millennia. For years, I struggled with what to make of "doubts" that I had. I'd agonize over them. Did they make me a bad Christian? Based on the public face of Christianity that is seen in the media most of the time, it would seem so.
And now as the mother of a teenager, my "interest" in doubt has been renewed. My daughter's generation doesn't take many of the things at face value that I remember taking as a teen. Her faith is something that I see her struggle with on a daily basis, and with news that the church is increasingly becoming less and less relevant for the millennials, I am always wondering how to connect to my daughter's generation to help them see the beauty of faith.
This is what was in the back of my mind as I began the work of sermon prep last week. And in the end, really, Thomas himself did all the work. He's a hero, that one.
And he took me on a fun little field trip as I was getting ready. The first thing that popped into my head when I saw that Thomas was going to be the star of my sermon was this:
That's Caravaggio's "The Incredulity of St. Thomas." Although I am a fan of Caravaggio's work, I wasn't aware of this particular painting until I was watching the television show LOST. (one of my all-time favorite shows).
LOST tackled faith and doubt and science and reason in a way that was - at least for me - more accessible than most pop culture (or even Christian culture) examples. In the ongoing arguments between John Locke and Jack Shepherd on faith versus science, faith was something to be grappled with. Something that was real. This scene sums it up perfectly. It's from Season 2 (Episode 3, "Orientation"):
"It's never been easy. I can't do it alone."
That sums it up. All of it. I think we spend so much time telling people what they should believe, that often we don't acknowledge that it isn't easy sometimes. But the relationships within our communities of faith - and with our friends and family and with God as well - are the building blocks that help decrease the anxieties of the doubts that often plague us.
As I said in my sermon, Thomas wanted proof that Jesus was alive because Thomas wanted Jesus! He wanted his friend. The relationship was important to him, and he wanted that blessed assurance that comes from seeing with our own eyes that our loved one is back again. Thomas didn't doubt because he was weak or a skeptic of some kind of dogma. Instead Thomas doubted because believing is hard and he needed the support of the relationship to nurture it.
One of the theologians I most respect is David Lose. His treatment of faith, doubt, and belief has influence my thoughts on this more perhaps than anyone's. Here's what he has to say about the two disciples on the road to Emmaus who are "slow of heart to believe." (and check out his blog: In the Meantime at http://www.davidlose.net)
Of course they are slow of heart to believe. The promises of Jesus are simply beyond anything in their – or our – experience or comprehension. Which is why we need them so much. The Gospel promise is that there is more to this world than what we can see. There is more to life than what we can experience. The pain, paucity, and poverty that color our life in this world are not the ultimate or final reality. Rather, resurrection life, joy and, yes, laughter are the enduring reality that Jesus is beckoning us into.
It may take time for us to believe that. But each we come together in worship we hear these promises again and are invited to connect them to our life in this world. And, eventually, we too will be drawn into the holy mirth of the resurrected Christ.
It ISN'T easy and we can't do it alone. Doubt however can invite us into relationship. Instead of being the opposite of faith, doubt is a vibrant part of a faith that takes itself seriously. Doubt is helped in the context of our relationships with God and with each other. Doubt brings us into honest and open conversation. Doubt is a very real part of the good news.
I hope that my daughter's generation sees this. Their doubts should be taken seriously and not dismissed easily. They have a hunger, and as a church, I hope we can continue to find ways to feed them.
